DONUT'S BREAKDOWN

 

Felix the Cat, Evil Kneivel, Elizabeth Taylor and Stephenie of Survivor: What do they have in common?  They have all used up about 8 of their 9 lives. The question for Stephenie is how long can she hold the tenuous grip she has on life number nine? So far her grasp is tighter than Faye Dunaway's face. She is clinging to her place in Koror like it was the last lifeboat to leave the Titanic.  She is tough and determined and even if she eventually goes, it won't be without a fight.

 

The biggest question this episode is merit vs expediency.  Stephenie has earned her place in the jury. Janu was pulled along in a hammock. The game of Survivor is counter intuitive. Who works hard, is pleasant and deserves to advance? That's the person to get rid of.  Stephenie is a physical threat. Janu will break if the wind blows too strongly. Stephenie pulls more than her weight around camp. Janu's weighs 12 pounds so even pulling her weight amounts to nothing. Stephenie gets along with everyone. Janu picks fights.  In the real world, I want Steph on my team. Actually, I want her leading my team. In Survivorworld she is a target.

 

The Reward Challenge divided the tribe in two and pit them against each other to build a water tower. While Ian and Stephenie worked hard for their team, Katie held them back. The team with Tom and Greg won, even while supporting the dead weight of Janu and Caryn. Janu looked to be trying her best while on the verge of death. Caryn clung to the buoy the way I would cling to Matthew McConaughey. The prize was a sumptuous feast and a glimpse at real Palauan life. Poor Stephenie. Even when part of a winning tribe someone else screws it up for her.  The prize offered a respite from mundane camp life, interaction with locals and a ritual performance with dancers wearing native garb reminiscent of Madonna during her cone bra period, although these coconut bikini tops were not as pointy. And of course, there was food. Wonderful food which Janu immediately puked up. How's that for an accompanying dinner show. I love going out to eat when the diner next to me is barfing. Really lends atmosphere and effectively curbs my appetite. Tonight's special at IHOB (International House of Bulimia):  Purge Surprise.  No strategy was discussed during their excursion. They decided to simply be in the moment and deal with plotting later. Upon their return Tom recounts their adventure and Greg surprises them with a doggie bag filled with delicious goodies. As the losers dig into the leftovers Janu and Caryn decide that they have missed a few of the tasty treats and they dig right in with them. How very George Costanza of them.

 

After 10 seasons of Survivor, many of the challenges are rehashes of old ones. If memory serves, this one was brand spanking new, with an added twist. For Immunity, players take their place in an underwater barred grate/cage. As the tide comes in the water rises limiting your breathing room. The person who stays down the longest wins. How do you handle fear? This was a test of remaining calm under pressure and punishment for past Barbie doll nose jobs. For some, panic set in immediately. Ian made jokes - "this guy goes into a bar" (he is so adorable-- I need to say that at least once per episode). For those  blessed with a large proboscis there was a built in advantage. Janu bailed after 6 minutes. Tom won. Not only did the fireman remain calm, he also devised a snorkel type system with his cupped hands to aid his breathing.  2 Immunities in a row. Tom is treading on dangerous sand. Everyone knows he is a major threat. Does he really need to keep reinforcing it? As for the loser Janu; the penalty for giving up is solitary exile to a private island.  Janu made a spontaneous decision that being cold in the water was worse than being alone on an island. It turns out that it was the best thing that could have happened to her.

 

Janu is not very popular. As the weakest player she seemed the most unlikely to manage alone. She panics after 5 minutes in cold water so how can she possibly function without support from the team? Everyone knows this but rather than express sympathy or concern they laugh about it. Katie is leader of the pack cracking joke after joke at Janu's expense. Katie, don't quit your day job. The Improv won't be calling. Jeff scolds them for their callousness but points out that there is clearly no love lost between them. Yet, after a few frightening hours without fire Janu gets a flame and celebrates her solitude. She thrives in her exile. She dances around her roaring bonfire like a wood nymph. It's a Midsummer Night's Epiphany. She is revitalized. She got out of the game what she needed and now she is ready to go.

 

The tribe has other plans, however. Despite Janu's desire to go home, Greg convinces Tom and Ian to vote against Stephenie. She's the toughest woman out there and she has a will to survive. Plus, she keeps beating Greg's gal pal Jenn in competitions. As Greg says, "she conquered Ulong and now she'll try to conquer Koror". Interesting how Greg opens his mouth and Jenn's voice comes out.  It becomes clear from Jeff's Probsting that Stephenie is to be the casualty of the night. Janu's entreaty to be voted off falls on deaf ears-- or maybe they are just waterlogged from the challenge. They have decided that Janu is an expendable pawn who can be kept on while she serves their greater purpose.  The irony of the situation is not lost on Stephenie who breaks down in tears. If tears help her to stay in the game then flood the camp, but Beware Steph-- you are an Ironwoman, and iron can corrode. Jeff won't let it go. He leads Janu down the path to extinguishing her flame as if she were Michael Jackson on the road to an elementary school. Was this her initial intention or did he taunt her into it? How much did Stephenie's emotional outburst impact Janu's decision? Was Janu's action a sacrifice to save a player who was more deserving or was it as simple as already getting what she wanted out of the experience? This was no monkey wrench that Janu threw into the master plan. This was King Kong. She took her destiny into her own hands and in doing so gave the power to one much more deserving. Way to go!!!

 

The dynamics can now shift. Tom and Ian can go back to their old alliances. The numbers are now in their favor. Greg and Jen must be split up. Stephenie is mad and she also knows all the dirt that Coby dished. In fact, she knows more than Tom and Ian. It ain't over til the fat lady sings. Since there are no fat ladies on Survivor we'll just have to wait and see who gets the last note. Until then......

 

GREENY'S BREAKDOWN

 

Greeny, Greeny. Has anyone seen Greeny?